Saturday, March 10, 2012

I Knew You When Our Common Goal Was Waiting For The World To End

Hii !
So yeah, I haven't been really active in updating my blog lately.
Mainly due to having no broadband - i do have one now, tapi sayang nak bazir kreds >.< - and wifi uia.. well, it's improving -_-
Also, been so busy. If I go online, mainly to tweet and vent my feelings.
There's nothing interesting in my life lately. Nothing too depressing. So why write ?
*Realizing I write a lot of depressing crap :DD

So anywaysssss,
I'm just done with my midsemexams ! It's been, fun and hell at the same time.
I hope I did well. I think my brain's like totally fried T.T  *anyone up for otak goreng ? ;p
For finals, I must not study like I did for midsem -__- I have to remind myself that. Haihhh.
Okey enough with crap bout crap.
I went to KLCC today, with an aim to meet Cheah and Madie.
And.. well.

I haven't seen you for so long, it's so weird seeing you. What's weirder, the last time we met, you meant a lot to me.
You were making me falling for you then.
The past.
A long time ago. But it's been what ? 2years ago ? Feels like ages ago.
God, I hope you don't read this. I really think nobody reads my blog anymore anyways. HAHA

I couldn't describe how awkward it was.
Well, there was you. I saw you first.
My first thought, was how taller and bigger you got. hehe. And your hair -_-
And then, I hesitated.
What do I say ?
Say, Hi.
Okay, then ?
Your turn.
So I said Hi.
And.. Well, our conversations were small talk. Exams, friends, nothing big.
I always imagined if we met, those big issues in between would burst.
But they cower, they hide, they pulled the bloody Invisibility Cloak right in front of our eyes.
Hoping we'll just ignore them. And so we did.
I rambled a lot. Didn't you notice ? I do that when I try to talk to make things get less awkward. But.. You just..well. Kept quiet. I got sad. I don't even know why.
And then,
The tiny voice in my head whispered.
This, is closure. This, is why it's time, we let those big issues just lose themselves in their hiding.
Is me,
Knowing you're not worth the risk anything anymore.

I have my hero. And you're still chasing her shadow. And in doing that, you turn to me, making me guilty, sorry, and think of what could've been.

I have my hero. I had entrusted him with my heart.
And writing this down. I feel so guilty.
I've realized
That for you, I've hurt him so many times.
I think it's time you stop being the reason.

Dear you..
I'm sorry.
This, is me. Saying goodbye.

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